May16...peace in the kingdom

Mike called Cindy before church today to get her to check on Ruth's T V and ask if things were good.Cindy said things were good. After church I had a message from Cindy that she was glad I didn't answer the phone as she(whoever she is) had pissed off her Mom and to call her when I got a chance. I called...we chatted about the same things that Ruth is going through AGAIN , tried to figure out what to think, what to do ,how to feel, etc ,etc...I tell Cindy I will go by to check on Ruth..
Ruth answers the door in her nightgown and looks beat. I ask her if she is OK.She says ,"I guess you heard about my fight with Claire." I say yes....She says," Well, she is not welcome here again." I say," Now Ruth..." She says," I'm not kidding, I don't care if I never see her again." She asks about the paper I have in my hand. I tell her," I told you I would make a list of what you owe me when it gets to a million dollars. I have come to collect my million." She laughs and says," Oh, I am so glad you did that for me.That relieves my worry about that." I see the blanket I bought laying on the chair just like the first blanket we bought . I ask her if she would like for me to return it. She says," Oh no, it is beautiful." I sit down...She lays down on the bed.
She is quiet for a moment and then says ," You know what else Cindy said to me today? She said she knows Mike is her brother ." I say nothing...She proceeds with the usual back and forth of how does she know him...why didn't she tell her...she had some nerve getting rid of her T V...she was mean to me..." I pick out the one thing I think I can win at and say," Ruth, in Cindy's defense, she knew about the new T V and didn't want to spoil the surprise by asking you what to do with the old T V so she kept quiet about it in order to not spoil your surprise." Ruth says," I can understand that but she should have told me today.That is just not right.'' ...Ruth's comment make no sense more and more of the time.
Ruth then asks if I bought the TV...AGAIN... I say ,"Mike and I did." OFF TO THE RACES...we spend an hour trying to work out who Mike is. Ruth is so offended that she has had a son for 59 years that never told her he is her son. She is aggravated at her other children for not introducing him. She is really, really aggravated why everyone keeps telling her that he has been to visit her on Mothers Day and other visits when she knows she has never met him. She asks if I can tell her any times I know he has visited her. I try to use tangible items to make her understand. I tell her he bought her mattresses and brought them to her..She says her husband brought them. I tell her Jack was dead. She says her other husband. I tell her she never married again. She pauses and ponders and says ,it was her boyfriend. I tell her the only boyfriend I ever knew of was the other Jack(there really was another Jack) who lived in St Pete. She said."You know, I think you are right. I did almost marry him but decided not to." She goes back to Mike. She wants explicit details of the mattress delivery....I give them to her. She gets quiet and then asks if there is anything else. I go through the list of things Mike has bought over the years. She says she finds it hard to believe..."Why would a stranger buy her all those things?" I tell her he is her son and wants to be sure she has all that she need. She says it just doesn't make sense.
We go over and over Mike , Michael, my husband Mike and she finally seems to have a little breakthrough moment about who he is....fleeting moment because she says her brother Dick buys her Mothers Day cards every year. I explain that that is Mikes card..She argues that it is Dick. I tell her Dick is dead. She can't believe it. I tell her it is true and give her the details. She says it must have been her one of her other brothers. I tell her they are all dead. She asks for names and specifics....I give them to her....She stares....She says she is talking about the brother who is taking care of her Mom at the house in N Y...I tell her her Mom is dead.She says I am right. All of the brothers being dead seems to make her try to stop and figure out if she is wrong about Mike. She says she just needs to meet Mike and see if he knows any childhood memories. I tell her she needs to be aware that she needs to be kind to him as this is very hurtful to him. She says she understands and that none of this is his fault .
She goes over her need to move. I tell her that she needs to figure out how she can move and stay within the parameters of what she can do. She says she really should be able to go live with Claire. I tell her that Claire has Alzheimer's and is in a home. She says she meant Cindy. I tell her no deal...She says she knows. She says she can go live with her brothers and sisters. I tell her she and Claire are the only surviving siblings. She says ,I am wrong as Jeanne is still living. I tell her she died in 2002. She asks where. I tell her Florida....She is quiet and then says he has no where to go. She changes the subject .
She goes back to Mike and his phone calls that we claim is him on Sat mornings. She asks how I know he calls her. I tell her I am there. She says I am crazy as it is her boyfriend who calls her and tells her how much he loves her. She is adamant that she knows she is right. I say nothing.
She is calming down. I tell her we need to let this go for now. I ask her to get me a drink. She jumps up and says she would love to. I ask her if she feels better. She says she really does. I say," And since I feel better, I would love to see Cindy next Sunday." She laughs and says," O K but she has to be nice. I guess I could be nice, too." I say," It never hurts to be nice." She laughs...I tell her I am tired of talking about this so I want to tell her about the movie Letters To Juliet. I tell her all about the movie. We talk about Laura Bush , Barbara Walters, dinner plans, Mikes job and on and on for another 45 minutes. She seems relaxed. I tell her I need to go. She says O K but I will miss you. I ask her again if she is feeling better. She says she feels so much better. She hugs me tightly and says how much she appreciates me coming over. I tell her I know she does. I tell her I won't be able to be over tomorrow as Mike wrecked the car. She says she knows. I tell her she can go down and have lunch. She doesn't complain like she normally does about how lousy the food is, she asks what they will be having. I tell her I don't know. She says she will go down tomorrow and see...even that statement is progress..
Good night Ruth.....